Questions, Quests, and Quarantines

aka "Frozen II and the Spiritual Life"

When Disney+ announced that "Frozen II" would be released early to the public due to the COVID-19 quarantines of 2020, I thought: "Hey, that's great for families." Second, I thought: "Hey, this means I can watch it!" 

I did not go to see the film in theaters since I was not convinced by trailers that it would be as stunning as the original. ("Frozen" has a special place in my heart since I (a) my sister and I both really liked it and connected with the characters, and (2) I saw it right before going to study abroad in Austria for a semester, so the movie itself and the music always take me back. Plus, that opening sequence - how could you not love that stunning montage?) 

But I have to say, I was very surprised at how much I enjoyed Frozen II! Naturally, this is because I saw a lot of deeper themes within the movie that have roots in Christian spirituality, which is (as you've probably guessed) what this post will be about. 

I started noticing these themes... 

in Olaf and Anna's first conversation in the movie. It starts off very comical, as Olaf comments that "change mocks us with her beauty" and then casually asks Anna (since she's "older and thus all-knowing"): "Do you ever worry about the notion that nothing is permanent?" 

As the first major musical number of the movie ("Some Things Never Change") starts, it becomes clearer what we'll see each of the characters representing and wrestling with in the rest of the movie. 

Olaf represents the childlike: he (we might say naively) trusts that someday he will understand, and, until then, he seems content to roll with whatever comes his way. 

Anna's focus is on not being alone, on staying close to the ones she loves both to protect them and because she feels safe and at home with them. She "relies on certain certainties," all of which are based on what the true, good, and beautiful. But we will also Anna's "certain certainties" challenged as the film goes on, which the song pre-empts as some of Anna's examples of things that stand firm actually are failing or falling around them. 

Meanwhile, Kristoff is wrestling with self-doubt as he faces the possibility of a major change in his relationship with Anna. He knows what he wants to do, but he wants to do it right and the pressure of getting it right is real. (Sven, as usual, is there for emotional support.) 

What about the Queen of Arendelle? Well, Elsa also expresses in this song a desire for things to stay the same because everything seems so good. But at the same time, she is experiencing a mysterious call that won't let her keep still. 

As the story begins, Elsa confides to Anna: "I just don't want to mess things up." But Anna reassures her saying: "When will you see yourself the way I see you?" By all accounts, it seems Elsa is doing well as Arendelle's new queen. In the previous song, we saw the people gathering in the square to celebrate a kind of Thanksgiving/harvest feast, the people all appear happy and satisfied, Elsa even uses her powers to create "ice toys" for the children. All seems to be well! 

But for Elsa, the mysterious call won't let her be, even after Anna reassures her. Cue the musical number!

Into the Unknown

Not much unlike "Let it Go" in Frozen, this song from Elsa's perspective is probably the most highlighted song of the movie. I admit, when I heard it, I was struck by the spiritual themes within. 

Elsa wakes to hear the call echoing through the castle, and she wrestles within herself. Part of her does not want to listen to the voice, resisting change. But she also can't help herself: she wants to know where the voice is coming from and where it's calling her to go. 

I can hear you but I won't

Some look for trouble while others don't

There's a thousand reasons I should go about my day

And ignore your whispers which I wish would go away.

You're not a voice

You're just a ringing in my ear

And if I heard you, which I don't

I'm spoken for I fear

Everyone I've ever loved is here within these walls

I'm sorry, secret siren, but I'm blocking out your calls

I've had my adventure, I don't need something new

I'm afraid of what I'm risking if I follow you

Into the unknown...

Almost instantly, I felt a personal connection with Elsa's words. As I've sought God's will and my vocation over the years, I've been Elsa in this moment. There's a constant back-and-forth within the self: a desire for things to stay the same (because after all, right here is, more or less, comfortable!), but at the same time a curiosity and draw to something more that God may be calling me to. I think this challenge is even more real when I know I've recently followed God's will to where I am now, but that question of "vocation" as it pertains to married, religious, or single life still hangs in the air. I love where I am right now; but maybe God has something more in mind.... Within the desire to know God's will, there's a lot of questioning that goes on, even in the midst of a lot of prayer: "Is this God's voice? Or is it my imagination? Or maybe it's a distraction from here and now, where my focus should be?" 

What do you want? 'Cause you've been keeping me awake

Are you here to distract me so I make a big mistake?

Or are you someone out there who's a little bit like me?

Who knows deep down I'm not where I'm meant to be?

Every day's a little harder as I feel my power grow

Don't you know there's part of me that longs to go…

Into the unknown?

...

Are you out there?

Do you know me?

Can you feel me?

Can you show me?

...

Where are you going?

Don't leave me alone

How do I follow you

Into the unknown?

At this point, I can't help but be reminded of Thomas Merton's prayer, where he says (which hopefully helps you breathe, if the "vocational confusion anxiety" has started to set in; don't worry, I get it): 

O Lord God,

I have no idea where I am going,

I do not see the road ahead of me,

I cannot know for certain where it will end.

Nor do I really know myself,

And that fact that I think

I am following Your will

Does not mean that I am actually doing so.

But I believe

That the desire to please You

Does in fact please You....

I still marvel when I listen to "Into the Unknown" at the depths of the searching soul that are expressed here. This is one of my favorite things about being Catholic - finding the One Who is Beauty in things that are beautiful, even if they're not "religious" in intent. 

Then...

When Elsa takes the first step in answering this call, things get a little chaotic. But as she opens up to people she trusts, she confesses her belief that whatever or whoever is calling her is good. She somehow knows this, in spite of rather dooming stories she and Anna have heard about the past. 

Our old friends the trolls make their first appearance here, and Pabbie informs the sisters that the fate of Arendelle rests on a wrong being righted. It is also in this moment we first encounter the theme: "When one can see no future all one can do is the next right thing." 

Would you believe we are only 20 minutes into this movie? Well it's true! There's so much here! But I'm going to pause here for now so we can all revel in the richness that we've found so far. 

Until next time, keep pursuing and encountering beauty.

The Itinerant Catechist

Back at It!

Hello, everyone!

It has been a long time since I last wrote here, and a lot has happened since then! Let me try to bring you all up to speed with some of my life events of the last...year and a half? Something like that. Let's just say the "Itinerant Catechist" has been doing a lot of "itinerating" since then. (I think that's a word.)

From Florida to the Midwest

At the end of May 2018, I made the long drive from Jacksonville to Ohio after finishing my 2 years of service at a parish in Florida.

In June of 2018, I wrote and presented for my Masters in Theology through the University of Notre Dame's Echo program. Throughout that process, I continued to be amazed at the beauty of the faith as I was privileged to study it more and more deeply. It may sound weird, and it definitely sounds nerdy, but I enjoyed writing my capstone.

It was also a tremendous gift to see my classmates present on their capstones as well, to see their unique gifts and incredible wisdom shine through their being. To celebrate our graduation Mass, and singing out "O God Beyond All Praising" with tears of joy in my eyes...it's something I will always cherish.

From the Midwest to the Smoky Mountains

After finishing my capstone and a couple of weeks at home, I (and my amazing parents) moved myself and my belongings to Knoxville, TN, to begin a position as the Director of Youth and Young Adult ministry at a parish there. 

During my time in Knoxville, I encountered so many incredible people and made several new friends whose hearts and souls inspired me to grow in holiness and hospitality each day. I also had the opportunity to be a part of an amazing movement called the "St. Meinrad Young Adult Initiative". 

This initiative was another great blessing in my life, as it opened my mind and heart to new ideas and strategies for encountering the young Church. 

Like any (or at least the majority of) first year in youth and young adult ministry, there were a lot of challenges, mostly just in trying to set the ground work and get things going. I had my past formation in youth ministry at Franciscan University which had prepared me for this first-year struggle, and so I was not surprised by this hurdle. But circumstances beyond my control shifted pretty dramatically during Holy Week of 2019 - which became a real opportunity to unite myself to Christ's sufferings. Nevertheless, I was determined to keep trying...until it more or less became clear that I might not be given the opportunity to do so. *

But, to quote Scripture: "We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose" (Romans 8:28). This saying did indeed prove trustworthy, for in the middle of all the "What am I going to do?" and "Why did this happen?" there came a clarity - this was an opportunity, a door that I could choose to walk through. 

Through prayer and a number of heart-to-heart conversations with friends, family, and mentors alike, I found myself recognizing something of my own situation in the Gospel story of the Annunciation to Mary. Interestingly, earlier in the year when the feast of the Annunciation came around, I found myself mysteriously drawn into the feast more than I had ever felt before.... The connection would continue to grow as I had the opportunity to take a group to Camp Covecrest for a week, and the theme? "Fiat." 

During this week, again the moments of grace kept cropping up - conversations with complete strangers, the homilies at Mass, the talks themselves...it all kept re-echoing the message of surrender, trust, and a resounding "yes" to God's invitation, even though it meant leaving behind my own ideas of how my life was going to look. 

*As you might have guessed, there's a lot more to this story; but my goal in writing this post is to give glory to God for His goodness, not get into the details of the sufferings and challenges of the situation. 

The Lord Provides - back to the Midwest

So, through the gracious gift of God, I received the offer to become a middle school Religion teacher at a school in Indiana. Again, there are a lot of details where Divine Providence totally blew me away in this process and how good the Lord is. But that's a story better told face-to-face, so if you'd like to know more, we'll just have to sit down over a cup of coffee someday. 

I am now 7 months into teaching, and surprise, we now have to relearn how to teach because our students can't come to school due to COVID-19. But hey! The Lord provides again, and so far the transition has been surprisingly smooth. 

Why am I back in the blogosphere? 

I've had some thoughts on the goings-on of the last couple of weeks, the Mass readings to accompany, and just the rich history of our Catholic faith that I'd like to delve into with willing readers. These "smatterings" will bring in Deuteronomy, St. Joseph, Frozen II, Vienna's plague pillar, and who knows what other connections the Holy Spirit may make. But the above is just a little way of my saying "hello, again!" after a long hiatus, and hopefully an opportunity to invite you all back to reading some reflections on our Catholic faith again. 

Stay home, and stay healthy, friends. Keep making those Acts of Spiritual Communion - and may we come to yearn for our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament like a bride longing for her husband. 

Happy Laetare Sunday! 

-The Itinerant Catechist